Billie Eilish: Same Interview, The Third Year | Vanity Fair

let's do this you're three y'all been asking for it so here we are my name is Billy Island Billy Eilish my name is Billy Eilish I think it's October 18th 2017 October 18th 2018 October 18th 2019 I'm 15 I'm 16 I'm 17 I have 257,000 I have six point three million forty point seven million that's great that's so do you Wow that's crazy one point one three million nine point six million 152 million Google searches of me Bing who the uses Bing it's a picture of me and Charli XCX isn't it the one about me smiling does a lot that's my face no that makes me feel good though cuz because sometimes the most like pictures like you with like another celebrity are you with somebody else but that's just me she's hard come on I'd say probably Khalid which is weird cuz he's like just a homing of mine Oh Haley Bieber Justin Bieber young thug Avril Lavigne Ariana Grande Kid Cudi ty dolla sign Oh Taylor god there's so many but like Drake come on Drake Drake is like the nicest dude I've ever spoken to I mean I've only like texted him but he's so nice like he does not need to be nice you know what I mean he's at a level in his life where he doesn't need to be nice but he is you know being apples up next artist jeez hey I did Ellen last week Jimmy Fallon so many festivals I met Takashi Murakami and went to his studio Dave girl's daughter did a cover of my song he played guitar for her at the talent show I think there's been a lot of that's happened in the last year my skin was so bad Jesus look I'm glowing now yes my skin got better i was the season opener for SNL i just sold out a headlining arena tour did Howard Stern Rolling Stone cover L cover V cover billboard cover released the album had a number one single had a number two single for like 16 weeks straight or some right biggest selling album of the year I have Drake's phone number the people that support me my fans which I don't like to call fans my you know my family you know god I was so annoying then finishing this album and doing the most crazy shows like I'm capable of doing in the next month I finished that album thank the Lords above because I was about to jump off a building to finish that album oh my god exhausting thank God I finished that I can't honestly sometimes I think about it sometimes I'm like like me and Phineas have had conversations while we're like can you believe we actually finished the album I swear to God we thought we would never finish that ever I love that album probably like a 10 dude I love it it away it's great sorry eh I never went to school I ever got grades sorry a plus that's what I meant most important thing right now though probably would be maintaining my happiness which I've been experiencing for like the first time in many years lately which is really cool and not that my friends aren't like also the other most important thing in the world and doing shows is also really important to me and doing crazy shows especially but I want to stay happy that's a big goal for me I don't know if I'm more confident I just think I know what I'm doing more I think I'm less confident actually true I was less confident for sure I was definitely not as confident last year as I was before that but I am for sure a billion times more confident confident than both of those years I feel like I'm probably the most confident I've ever been in my life I guess I don't know how the I don't know how it happened but I guess I am I am definitely successful I was thinking about that like earlier today because of this interview I was like back then I thought it was like the biggest it was ever gonna be and I thought you know it was the most I was never gonna be recognized and it was the most anyone's gonna know me and it was the most money that I would have the most clothes I have most shoes that I'd have and what's crazy it wasn't success is not how well people know you it's how you're like looked at I had genuinely did not think people would care I like can't even stress it enough I can't believe people care so much about me it's crazy to me I might be safe if I go to Trader Joe's No not safe I tried it I went to Trader Joe's did not work nope did not work tried it I also tried Costco which I thought I'd be safe at and that didn't work sake the reason it was like affecting me so much last year was because all I wanted to do was go out I don't even think about going out anymore I like this life that I have I like pain in this it's very weird but it's very cool and I can I feel like I can say that now because I used to hate it I hated doing press and I hated being recognized and I hated kind of everything that had to do with it there's a lot in Fame that's gross and horrible and just miserable but I'm very grateful for it and it's really rare and it's really I'm very lucky so I'm so done with complaining about it I complained about it for so long probably that stupid cheeto head man November 6th there's an election soon I really hope everyone votes so the world doesn't end there's an impeachment going on honestly the news is so bad I can't even oh yea Beyonce had some twins and she still looks fly Kalani's pregnant Gretta Thunderbird honestly she's been kicking people's ass ass get it that can die okay ask any supposed to be like let's get it but like a skin it is so annoying stop oh that stupid snapchat filter that's like Jenna Jenna I'm kind of over the whole like dueling that is so ugly like smoking looks cooler than Julie I think don't like don't smoke but yeah like people think I'm pregnant and sad people thought I was pregnant for a second they did think I was pregnant there was like a story on snapchat the other day it was like wait did Billy Eilish have a baby it's like what biggest rumor though now that I sold my soul to Satan no I don't have a boyfriend I can't I could not have a boyfriend that would just be mean to him I don't know I almost had one for like it wasn't really exclusive so no hate that's so funny I don't have a boyfriend I actually did them but I don't know I still am on good terms with everybody um and I still have so much love for like the person that I was within and but I am single and about to turn a tingle for the first time in my life I don't feel the need to be with anyone for the first time in my life I I don't have my eyes on anyone I'm not in the mood I don't have enough stamina for it right now and I'm totally fine with that so who knows I'm open to it I think the month of May probably mid-may I was in a horrible place mentally so I'm when a friend of mine died in June this was pretty bad in January I had a meeting showing me the schedule for the whole year and I sat there and was totally silent and totally still and just tears like just streamed down my face I went to my [Music] garage and I just cried it just was very overwhelming and I was in a really bad place so I don't want to take it for granted I don't want to take it for granted I catch myself even some things I've said today I catch myself what am i doing what am I saying what 40,000 people what are you ever conscious that you're doing something that you don't want to be doing but you just you're just doing it it was like that because I was taking it for granted and I that makes me really mad and I don't want to be and I just was I don't know I worked really hard on not doing that as I said in that and I've kind of held my ground a little bit I think I have like kind of accomplished not taking it for granted I've been really grateful for everything and really aware lately and I just was realizing that I was giving too much of myself to other people's lives into other people's situations and I was like you know what I need this attention on me right now so yeah Fruitvale station Fruitvale station Fruitvale station the storyline is so heartbreaking dude that grabs you and pulls you in oh no this I can't afford a real change they are real my chains were gifts I did not buy anything that I'm wearing I stopped wearing real jewelry like real diamonds and stuff because a imma break that B i'ma lose that see I got other to buy you know what I mean I like bright green a lot I like black it's been pretty dark lately so I've just wanted to be dark with it black is like the only time I can go through the airport and be fine that's cool because the airport is normally like basically being at a meet-and-greet but if I'm wearing a black beanie and a black shirt and some black pants and black shoes I'm pretty good I like them all like I'm not opposed to anything anything ah yep yeah I feel that there is pressure on me but I don't feel the pressure you know what I mean I feel it less now that it's bigger in a way it's like performing in front of 80,000 people is way easier than performing in front of eight people I don't know why I kind of would say the the no respect element of the getting recognized I want a hug I want to talk to somebody and hear how their day went I don't want a camera shoved in my face mm-hmm it's gotten much worse since then excitement makes you be kind of stupid sometimes I did this show last week where I went down into the crowd and I just did this to all the hands and somebody grabbed my hand and yanked me so hard and I had two security guards two of my security guards with my hand in one hand and or my arm in one hand and I'm literally going like this to try to pull me away and it took a minute to do it I'm like bending over and I was also singing ocean ice at the same time I was like like and I and then that when they finally let go I like fell on top of this thing and then somebody stole my ring somebody grabbed my hand and pulled my ring off stole it whatever I expect that and then I leaned back into this one area of all these fans and this one girl just went and I at first I was like she probably didn't mean to because she kind of went like this they're only trying to be loving and sometimes it just comes off wrong that's it don't post everything you think should give it to myself into but I do it now I don't anymore yeah that's what I was just saying sometimes better to shut the up I would tell sixteen year old me to to remember who her best friends are and remember who the people that care about her the most are and not throw them away for somebody else or for something else I really hope that I'm not an because I'm really afraid that I will be and I really don't want to be you better not be an or I will whip your ass I don't know if I'm my I my god she's good see I didn't oh my god I was so bubbly and what was funny that wasn't actually in real life I just was new to new to interviews and I thought I had to be all like bubbly when I watched that when the other one came out last year I was like I like didn't know I could swear I was saying like freaking what the heck what the heck laryngitis as heck tiring as heck mine I don't think I'm maybe I don't know I performed for a bunch of Jared Leto's friends and Jared Leto in his house I performed for Leonardo DiCaprio injured big huge living room bieber watch my Coachella said that's crazy MLC sporty spice came to my show Avril Lavigne came to my show Tom York came to my show Dave Grohl's come to my show Billie Joe Armstrong came to my show Julia Roberts has come to my show Leonardo DiCaprio who watched my SNL show but a backstage I don't even know why he was there Chris Rock um well I didn't know for those last couple of they were in there Bieber I was thinking about that the whole time Bieber and Haley were both watching me and I I luckily I didn't see them because if I had seen them I would have lost my whoa Lil Wayne Oh to perform with Lil Wayne that's a great answer myself I don't know it's hired another whatever other people doing shows with other people is really stressful Brockhampton tiara whack is sick my favorite artist is techno there isn't one song that I don't like that he puts out every single song that that man puts out I love shouldn't that count as your favorite artist is an artist that puts out music that you only like you know what I mean having the approach that no one's had trying to write something no one's written it's so stupid I remember that try to write something no one's ever heard and what an idiot see that's why I'm still bad at it because that's what I was trying to do whoo true that's so funny yeah she's right yeah I still learn bad at it honestly I don't know because I kind of have no idea what to expect like I thought I knew like last year I thought I knew what the what people would like for my album and I thought I knew like what would be popular I was so wrong bad guy is like the biggest thing ever now which is so weird I did not think anyone like that one so I have no clue I'm I almost have a feeling that the one that I would say is my favorite like one right now people might not even like it so I have no idea the music industry man we're all sad as hell all these artists we're sad as dude everybody I know that's an artist we are sad mother so annoying I somebody got that tattooed that quote I don't think it's fair to say that we're all sad because I don't think that's true I was just sixteen and friends with a bunch of other you know young people that were kind of going through the same stuff like having this crazy spotlight on them and they were sad too and that's why I think I thought that but I hadn't I didn't experienced it I think it's a it's a beautiful thing we get to do I think it's really difficult and I think that's what people don't realize and that's why I wanted to say that then yeah it was terrifying and it's like it still is but I enjoy it and I I don't know Android oh I just want to do I want to create what I want to create when I want to create it it's gonna change no matter what same whatever I want oh my god telling myself to do something different next year I'm gonna just do what I want next year I'm doing this year that I dress and look really different than my music which is true for all the old music I have or like the stuff I put out like years ago but you got to remember I was 13 when ocean eyes came out and then I was 14 when I wrote like all the rest and then I was 15 when I wrote don't smile at me with my brother when we put that out know I'm 16 and all year I've just been making music that's gonna come out when I'm 17 and then when I'm 17 I'll probably be like yeah this isn't me now but it was me when I was 16 and then I'll make music when I'm 17 and then when I'm 18 I'll be like this isn't me now a genius oh my god hell yeah damn articulate she stated it perfectly dude she put it better than I could have put it I mean it the thing is that the ones that annoy me are the ones that are pretty true like my voice is really soft and it's not belty and and that people think that I oh I whispering all my songs and like I do in a couple songs but I feel like people just say that about because that when they've heard one song like listen to wish you were gay a bishop Alton and like my belt is not even close to it Adele Belt Adele was like a literal God but it's just different like you don't have to be shouting to be good at singing my brother is my best friend my brother is my best friend my best friend is Phineas but he is also my brother Instagram probably Instagram I just remember hurting my feelings lately I really see everything but that's the problem is that I see everything so then I see everything I don't want to see him you know it's just this mmm thing in my brain so lately it's I don't like looking at it a fan brought me a notebook filled with huge like letters from my fans to me all from different people and it's like tons of pages it's incredible people throw a lot of things at me on stage I've been thrown you know bras avocados a girl gave me is huge like stuffed blows that she made with this like velvet material and I have been sleeping with it for a week now I wasn't gonna tell anyone that it's really cosy though but the other day I was lying in bed thinking like what if she put a camera in this thing it's really hard to talk about my life and have it not sound like I'm bragging my nose is so cute in that sorry I just look at that nose like a little button sometimes I'll catch myself in a conversation with someone acting like I'm in an interview and in interviews you're trained to talk about yourself and not ask the other person about themselves and so I'll catch myself in art in conversations where I'm like like I'm not be I'm being interviewed I'm acting like I'm being interviewed instead of acting like I'm talking to a human being and I think some artists and celebrities haven't even learned that and still just do that and people I love do that that I've met where they just they're trained to talk like they're in an interview and that's normal but it's like we forget that we're not though yeah the first year I was like you better know how to drive right and didn't I say oh no I saw this part recently it was like you better know how to drive because I've been putting off drivers in because that stuff stinks I hate that stuff oh that stuff stinks why did I say that sucks like I could have said that that suck at what that stuff stinks oh my god so cringy jeez hey Billy a year ago you have your dream car can you believe it no you can but you can though because it's your car now um it was a Dodge Challenger matte black actually literally two months from today is my birthday so two months after that day I got my dream car and I cried for about three hours you better have a Lamborghini the mom moment to please this is my mom she is sick as a booty I don't mind I can stay here that long I love it next year I hope you're very very happy and that your happiness you have this year continues and only grows you have everything you want in life and you help change the world for the better mom is definitely gonna help change the world more than I am [Applause]

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